nalgenie 
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« Reply #15 on: September 04, 2009, 08:49:41 PM » |
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Q: What do Tornados and New England Patriots fans have in common?
A: Sooner or later, they'll both end up in trailer parks!
i am going to have to keep an eye on this section...you blasphemer!!! thank you for the warning my friend lips!! PATRIOTS ROCK!!! we killed the GIANTS! you not funny man..  |
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« Last Edit: September 04, 2009, 08:54:37 PM by nalgenie »
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Money talks...and mine says goodbye!
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #17 on: September 12, 2009, 08:28:21 PM » |
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Q: What do the Green Bay Packers and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell “Jesus Christ”.
Lips
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medtrans
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« Reply #18 on: September 12, 2009, 11:14:06 PM » |
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A Packers fan is having breakfast one morning; coffee, croissants, bread, butter & jam when a Bears fan, chewing gum, sits down next to him. The Packers fan ignores the Bears fan who, nevertheless, starts a conversation:
Bears fan: "You Packers folk eat the whole bread??"
Packers fan (in a bad mood): "Of course."
Bears fan: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. In Illinois, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle them, transform them into croissants and sell them to Wisconsin."
The Bears fan has a smirk on his face. The Packers fan listens in silence.
The Bears fan persists: "Do you eat jelly with the bread??"
Packers fan: "Of course."
Bears fan: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We don't. In Illinois we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to Wisconsin."
The Packers fan then asks: "Do you have sex in Illinois?"
Bears fan: "Why of course we do", he says with a big smirk.
Packers fan: And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?"
Bears fan: "We throw them away, of course."
Packers fan: "We don't. In Wisconsin, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to Illinois."
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #19 on: September 22, 2009, 11:14:02 AM » |
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Nal,
This one is for you darlin:
Q: What do the Patriots and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
roflmaoooooooooooooo!!!!!
Lips
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nalgenie
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« Reply #20 on: September 22, 2009, 06:34:56 PM » |
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #21 on: September 26, 2009, 08:29:40 PM » |
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Hey Tonster,
Q: What’s the difference between the Cleveland Brown & a dollar bill?
A: You can get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Lips
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #22 on: September 28, 2009, 11:24:23 AM » |
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Mathew Stafford died and arrived at the Pearly Gates.
Saint Peter asked him, "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?"
Mathew thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street."
Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the records, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that it was true.
Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's not really quite enough to get you into Heaven."
Mathew said, "Wait, wait! There's more! Three years ago, I also gave a homeless person a quarter."
Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who, after a moment, nodded back to affirm that it was true.
Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?"
Gabriel gave Mathew Stafford a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter, "Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."
Lips
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PMM2008
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« Reply #23 on: September 28, 2009, 11:29:00 AM » |
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Lame Lame Lame.... I would expect better from you Lips.... Your little attempt to get to me are showing your getting nervous about the game. Go Lions.... PMM |
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~ Loyalty means nothing unless it has at its heart the absolute principle of self-sacrifice. ~
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #25 on: September 29, 2009, 04:48:41 PM » |
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The NFL announced today that for financial reasons, they had to eliminate one team from the league. So they've decided to combine the Green Bay Packers and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and form one team, therefore saving jobs. They will be known as the TAMPACKS. Unfortunately, they're only good for one period and have no second string.
Lips
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nalgenie
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« Reply #26 on: September 29, 2009, 10:27:10 PM » |
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hahahahahahahaha good one!!!!!!!!  |
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PMM2008
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« Reply #27 on: September 29, 2009, 10:46:01 PM » |
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HAHAHHAHAH, Now that was funny!!!
PMM
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~ Loyalty means nothing unless it has at its heart the absolute principle of self-sacrifice. ~
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medtrans
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« Reply #28 on: September 30, 2009, 12:10:21 PM » |
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The NFL announced today that for financial reasons, they had to eliminate one team from the league. So they've decided to combine the Green Bay Packers and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and form one team, therefore saving jobs. They will be known as the TAMPACKS. Unfortunately, they're only good for one period and have no second string.
Lips
Yeah and after further review da bears still suck! |
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #29 on: October 02, 2009, 12:24:00 PM » |
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Switch sides..
Bloke comes home from the bar drunk at 4am in the morning. His wife is sleeping and he tries to sneak into bed. He's laying in bed for a few minutes and lets rip a fart. His wife wakes up and asks, "What in the world was that?"
He replies, "Touchdown, I'm up 7 nothing."
She thinks to herself, "I'm gonna fix him." Then she lets one loose.
He yells at her, "What was that?"
She replies "Touchdown, tie score."
Now he thinks, "I'm gonna fix her." He's laying there for about 10 minutes trying to work one up. He tries so hard he pukes in bed.
The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?"
He replied, "Half time, switch sides."
Lips
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