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Tony Trader
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« on: September 01, 2009, 07:22:27 AM » |
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Being i was born in Detroit i just had to show this joke.
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Detroit Lions. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then, one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Lions go on to win the Super Bowl. The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you, the old Muslim woman says. "You deserted us. You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!"
The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit !"
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #1 on: September 01, 2009, 09:29:51 AM » |
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Tony,
I got a funnier one.........Da Bears playing the Browns Thursday nite...........lmaooooo!!!!!
That's a NO brain-er...... who's gonna win that.............Da Bears!!!!!!!!!!!
Lips
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #2 on: September 01, 2009, 09:37:41 AM » |
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Tonster,
Heres another funny one............wink!!!!
Q: What do you call 53 people sitting around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A: The Cleveland Browns.
Lips
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #3 on: September 02, 2009, 09:25:34 AM » |
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Hey Ton,
Q: How do you keep a Cleveland Brown out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.
lmaooooooooo!!!!!!
Lips
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“If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us”
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Tony Trader
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« Reply #4 on: September 02, 2009, 09:47:59 AM » |
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Game on lips,
Q: What did Jesus say to the Chicago Cubs last time he was on Earth?
A: “Don’t do anything til I get back.”
Tony
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« Last Edit: September 02, 2009, 09:57:52 AM by Tony Trader »
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Tony Trader
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« Reply #5 on: September 02, 2009, 10:13:21 AM » |
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Travel warning
I just wanted to give you a warning if you are heading up toward the
Twin Cities on Interstate 94. The Minnesota State Patrol is cracking
down on speeders.
For the first offense, they give you two Viking tickets.
If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them!!!!!!!!!
Minnesota Vikings fans below
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« Last Edit: September 02, 2009, 10:15:08 AM by Tony Trader »
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Tony Trader
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« Reply #6 on: September 02, 2009, 10:40:29 AM » |
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3 packers fans in a bar
A bears fan in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a joke about Packers fans?"
The guy next to him replies, "Well before you tell that joke you should know something. I'm 6' tall and 220 pounds and I'm a Packers fan. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, 240 pounds and he's a Packers fan, and the guy sitting next to him is 6'5", 280 pounds and he's a Packers fan too. Now, do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The Bears fan says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times."
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medtrans
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« Reply #7 on: September 02, 2009, 11:14:15 AM » |
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ahem....
Four NFL Football fans want to find out who is the most loyal to their team, a Chicago Bears fan, a Green Bay Packers fan, a Cleveland Browns fan, and a Detroit Lions fan. They climb to the top of a high mountain. The Bears fan, wanting to prove he is most loyal, yells at the top of his voice, "This is for the Chicago Bears!", and jumps off the mountain. The Lions fan, not wanting to be outdone by his rival, also yells at the top of his voice, "This is for the Detroit Lions!", and jumps off the mountain. Now the Packers fan, knowing in his mind that he is the most loyal, yells at the top of his voice, "This is for the Green Bay Packers!", and pushes the Browns fan off the mountain.
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I love this forum.
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #8 on: September 03, 2009, 08:43:18 AM » |
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Hey Tonster,
Q: Where do you go in Cleveland in case of a tornado?
A: Browns Stadium - they never have a touchdown there .
Game on tonite toots!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lips
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #9 on: September 03, 2009, 08:48:45 AM » |
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Hey Med,
What do you call a Green Bay Packer with a Super Bowl ring?
A thief...............lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Tony Trader
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« Reply #10 on: September 03, 2009, 08:48:49 AM » |
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One Sunday afternoon, a guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender said, "Sorry, pal. No pets allowed." The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Bears game and you'll see." The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game. The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Bears score, my dog does flips." The Bears keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping. "Wow! That's one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Bears score a touchdown?" asked the bartender. The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years."
Tony
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Tony Trader
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« Reply #11 on: September 03, 2009, 08:58:58 AM » |
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Mommy Bear and Daddy Bear were in divorce court. The judge looked down and asked the Baby Bear, "So Baby Bear, do you want to live with Daddy Bear?" "Oh, no," Baby Bear replied, "I don't want to live with Daddy Bear. He beat me." "Well then, you should live with Mommy Bear," answered the judge. "On, no, I don't want to live with Mommy Bear. She beat me." "Well then, Baby Bear, who do you want to live with?" Baby Bear said, "I want to live with the Chicago Bears. They don't beat anybody!"
Tony
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Tony Trader
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« Reply #12 on: September 03, 2009, 11:39:59 AM » |
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Q: What do Tornados and New England Patriots fans have in common?
A: Sooner or later, they'll both end up in trailer parks!
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #13 on: September 04, 2009, 01:30:13 PM » |
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Q: What do Tornados and New England Patriots fans have in common?
A: Sooner or later, they'll both end up in trailer parks!
You better not let Nal see this one...i just may have to tell her........lmaooooooo |
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lipstick_xoxos
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« Reply #14 on: September 04, 2009, 01:32:26 PM » |
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Tony,
One more for you since we kicked ur a** last nite!!!
Why doesn’t Columbus have a professional football team?
Because then Cleveland would want one.
Lips
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“If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us”
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